Funny Quotes
I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. Lily Tomlin All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed. Sean O'Casey Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. Brendan Gill She said she was approaching 40, and I couldn't help wondering from which direction. Bob Hope My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then figure out how to sell it for $5.00 a glass. John Woodman In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. Joey Adams The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. Lilly Tomlin Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. Charles Schulz I tell you this, and I tell you plain:What you have done, you will do again;
You will bite your tongue, careful or not,
Upon the already-bitten spot.
Mignon McLaughlin